My Point of No Return

Martin Uhnak
4 min readJan 5, 2018


Photo by Joey Kyber

My daughter was about six months old. I got fired from a job I didn’t like, and it left me in an empty state. I started looking for answers.

The point of no return, according to Benjamin P. Hardy, is a pivotal moment a person has to experience to perform at the top of their potential and achieve their dreams. He’s putting in the research and found some intriguing results.

There is a definite pattern in qualitative answers of successful entrepreneurs and their counterparts, as he likes to call them — wantrepreneurs, the people who love to talk about going into business, but never do much about it. Apparently, the successful people share a defining moment, and they attribute their decisions that lead to later success to that moment.

Now, you might come across an article and think— what the heck is this guy talking about? Is this some magic or a mythical resurrection?

Once again, it’s simple and complicated. If you’ve witnessed a moment like this, you recollect instantly and distinctly. If not, it may sound like some motivational crap.

The power of perspective-taking

Recently, a friend of mine sparked a conversation about a couple in his proximity whose behavior didn’t align his views. Although I agreed with his points, I countered with a request to postpone judgment and maybe try to understand their perspective. There is no merit in judging how anyone perceives their defining influences.

We all have our own experiences, unique and original to every single one of us. Every perception is unique hence valuable. Further, these perceptions can form stories that can influence others. If you touch one soul it might be worth doing.

Chris Anderson of TED Talks mentions in his book that everyone has a story to tell. However insignificant, your perspective can be inspiring.

Aspirational authenticity

To one, the following sentence doesn’t make sense:

Do what you can’t.

To me, it’s fascinating.

The sentence made a difference with me because I watched the video in a time where I was desperately searching for authenticity. I obsessed with finding the real me. It was the only thing I wrote about.

About then, I watched some of Casey Neistat’s videos, and it left an imprint. The guy seems so authentic in front of the camera. When I watch some of his videos, he makes me feel significant. He’s taking me on a journey that might even be so minuscule as a day in his studio, but the feeling I get is that he cares that I’m watching. We’re hanging out together.

The occasionally insignificant stories on Casey’s YouTube channel are magically compelling. If you’re like me, you relate instantly. He looks on the screen like what you imagine he’s like in real life. You aspire to the authenticity. You want to be there, be aware and okay with all your imperfections and flaws.

Humility and confidence

My daughter was about six months old. I got fired from the job I didn’t like and it left me in an empty state. What have I been doing the past few years? What about the past few months? What do I have to show for it? Who is the man to whom my daughter looks up?

I started looking for answers. Little did I know that I will never find the answer. The answer seems to be asking the right questions.

Esther Perel says that she doesn’t know anything. She continues that none of what she says is made up, but she is not certain about anything. This inspiring lady is a professor of psychology, wrote two world best-selling books and speaks nine languages.

This is one of the many proofs that I find fulfillment in growth.

This thought gave me permission to look for what I truly enjoy. I started writing because I always aspired to. I fell in love and wrote every day since. I accepted the beginner’s mindset. I’m not afraid to make mistakes.

I was able to fix many things since I started looking. Today, it feels like everything clicked in the right place.

I keep looking.

I am contented with the new found joy in writing. I rediscovered the relationship with my wife and became more calm and thoughtful. I started spending a massive amount of time with my girls.

On the day 70 of journaling, I received two job offers. I accepted one of them, and now I’m working with my best friends on something that is meaningful and valuable.

I’ve never been able to say this candidly.

I am happy now.

I have none of the answers. I know my writing isn’t good enough. I still don’t know what I’m good at. But I am confident I can get better.

The opportunity to grow is what keeps me motivated.

Nathan Kontny is neither the biggest writer on Medium nor a famous author. Yet, it was his posts that inspired me to publish. Especially the one about how South Park producers are never satisfied with what they publish. That the 4 weeks of pondering over a 5% resulting change in quality would’ve left them in obscurity.

The post didn’t go viral nor has 70k claps. It resonated with me in a way that I cannot put in words. Other than saying thanks.

Everyone has an inspiring story to tell.

You can change a life without knowing it.

Thanks for reading!

During the next month, I’m challenging myself to publish one article every weekday. I’m writing about my struggles, acceptance and the tools that help me on my journey.

Please hold 👏 and hit follow if you found this interesting. It will help me keep going. You’re great!



Martin Uhnak

Product Designer & Strategist